(quoted by Janus 1981, p.126, see Brongersma 1990, p.55)
In her study of 137 incestuous relationships, 53% were described as positive, by the male substantially more (62%) than by the female. Of non-exploitative incidents, more than 75% were valued as positive. (pp. 166, 168, 171).
As for myself, I believed that sexual intimacy was incompatible with authority until my observation of some actual incest relationships convinced me that this was not necessarily so.
We must keep in mind, however, that despite all the possible benefits to the child, there are incestuous relations where really terrible forms of physical achild abuse take place. Since sexual violence against boys is rather rare, victims are characteristically daughters rather than sons. But fathers may abuse children of both genders in more subtle ways that are deeply traumatic, humilating, horrifying and pregnant with potential disaster. It is much worse, much more damaging and traumatising, to be compelled to accept sex passively (for in the family there can be no escape!), to be made to say "Yes, I will" when all your instincts and feelings cry out "No, I don't wont to do that!", to be, in effect, treated as a slave, than to fight against a sexual attack and be subdued by sheer physical force which at least permits the child to retain his self-esteem, his sense of dignity.
The real twist of the knife in these situations is that it is precisely those people in the child's intimate environment to whom he looks for care and protection that commit the crime against him or show no concern while he is being molested. Whenever such sad cases come to light society certainly should be allowed to radically intervene. Penal law, however, often harms more than it protects. Is it helping the child to send his father to prison, deprive his family of its income, subject his family to the contemptuous gossip and scorn of its neighoburs? Fear of this happening often prevents the mother from taking action on behalf of her child. The police, then, should not automatically be called in; better the doctor trained in matters of child abuse, or the child protection agency, or the social worker. They should co-operate in finding an acceptable solution for both father and child, and use the law only as a last resort.